update de la vida

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P0FW--zidYA - I don't know how to make the music appear but listen to this song whilst reading because it's been my main study music and it makes me stop in my tracks and think all the time...

Throughout my life I've always found it hard to accept the love of God for me. Love is such a hard concept to get my mind around- its a choice and its free will and it's not forced and its barely an emotion because it's so much bigger. I've been told by friends and family that I'm loved, and I know it because of their sacrifices and actions, yet the love of God has seemed a far away entity. It's seemed like a light in the distance when the rest of my concept of that was just dull. I knew it was true, some how, I'd read about it and heard about it. I knew it was more than a feeling, more than an emotional high that people get....

Since being here and reading about God's active persual of the Israelites when they seriously do not deserve it has been changing everything in my mind. The holiness of God has always seemed like a far away concept to me too but I now understand it so much bigger. God is perfect and completely blameless and everything he does is wise and right. He made humans who had free will and chose sin against him, which caused a separation between us and him, the unholy and the holy. Yet God in his kindness allowed a way for there to still be a relationship between us through a commitment to him to love him with all that we are.

 In the Old Testament this included sacrifices and then through Jesus, who was the ultimate sacrifice, there is a way for humans and God to be reconciled. It's so beautiful and doesn't make sense. Anyways, understanding God's holiness makes understanding God's love so much more tangible. The two really do go hand in hand, it's near impossible to comprehend a fraction of who God is without knowing God is complete love but also complete holiness. And through this revelation I have been able to have flickers of light of understanding God's love for me. Instead of love being a far away light in the distance it's now a bright light that shines in front of me. This may be a cliche description but it's honestly the only way to describe it. 

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We have just finished the Pentateuch and now we are starting the different kings of Israel. 

Through reading Joshua, I had a massive revelation within the first 7 verses of the book.... So I thought I'd share a part of the application I wrote for the book of Joshua. The concept or 'timeless truth' that I used for this application is

Joshua 1:7 TT knowing God's law results in knowing God's character, which results in knowing God will be faithful to what he promises

...This week I have learned so much about what this process means. Knowing the law and God's heart behind what he commands will give me assurance of who God is, and naturally from that I will understand that God will be faithful to whatever he says. Similarly, the more I get to know a friend, the more I see how they act and what their character is, the more I am assured of how they will act. If they are running late then I know, because of who they are, that there is a good reason for them to be late. (God is never late, but sometimes we think is- but theres always a reason why he's waiting!) Or if they challenge me with an issue I know they do it out of love, because I know that their heart is full of love. This has been a huge mind shift change for me. Most of the time I try to skip the first steps and then I end up wondering why I’m so afraid all the time, and why I’m not confident in who God is and therefore I don’t trust him. I know sometimes God can reveal himself powerfully giving faith to us to know he will fulfil promises, but to be really solid and get through life’s daily struggles, I know having a mind and heart full of God’s words is most important. Through having a renewed mind of God’s law, then I will know him deeper and more personally, knowing that what he says will be true...

and because of this I know being here and doing what I'm doing is the best thing to be doing. 

We just finished studying Judges and through it I was so in awe the whole time of how God kept redeeming his people even when he knew that their hearts were selfish and they'd actually never love him back fully. It was so heart breaking and beautiful to see the Lord's continual commitment and love for his people even though the love wasn't reciprocated. 

Though I'm here in California I spend literally 90 % of my days in the classroom studying away, 8am-9pm usually. I'd like to thank everyone who has supported me this far, and if you'd like to be a part of my journey then I'd like to welcome you to continue to support me through this process of having my whole theology and understanding of God turned around !!! it's so sweet!!

Also I wrote a few months ago that soon I'll be able to find out why you can't boil a baby goat in it's mothers milk... and here's why......

1. because its unhygienic and people gonna get sick off of that! and 2. because the pagans would give weird sacrifices like that and the Israelites were called to be different.... !! =] there u go. <3 <3 Lots of love from the other side <3 <3 

S-B-Stressss

Hola from the sunny and beautiful California!!

Here I am studying the Bible for 9 months, and I arrived here just 3 weeks ago, we dived straight into Genesis and learning how to do the homework. We had 3 days of classes for Genesis, looking at history, who wrote the book, who it was written to, significance of certain passages etc. It's been so interesting to see patterns, and just to gain general information like who Genesis was written to (The Israelites). God had to kick out Adam and Eve from the garden because if they ate from the tree of life after the tree of good and evil they would have actually ended up living forever, so God kicking them out was actually a kindness. 
I had no idea.

After the first week I essentially wrote a 60 page commentary on Genesis, about the history, about what patterns meant to the original reader and how I can apply the truths to my life. Last week we were studying Exodus and it's crazy to see such personal and specific laws and commandments being given to the Israelites after they've been brought out of Egypt. The Israelites were enslaved in Egypt for hundreds of years, surrounded by Egyptian culture and religions, so going from hundreds of gods to just one God who is relational and personal would have been such a shock for the Israelites.
God also really emphasises that the 7th day of the week needs to be a rest day which after being enslaved and told by Pharaoh (who was God to the Egyptians) that they had to do back breaking work would have been so contradictory. I'm learning so many things because I am studying each passage so in depth, I'm seeing patterns and repetition and things are clicking whereas whenever I read Genesis and Exodus before I never understood anything really.

Now we are studying Leviticus and my thoughts most of the day are 'it just doesn't make sense'..
1. because it takes time to really understand the verses and what they mean..
and 2. because why would God want to come and live with his sinful, unfaithful people? I guess the only logical reason would be because of pure, holy love that seeks relationship and connection. It doesn't make sense.

SBS is blowing my mind. I feel like everything I thought I knew about God before is only a tiny fraction of who he actually is. and we're only 3 books in. I'm learning really deep truths, and I am seeing God in a new light and I respect him so much more!!!

I really know SBS is a crucial time of training and learning for me right now. I am so thankful to be here even though the work is tiring and long. And I want to say thank you again for everyone who helped send me here and who believed in me! I know it's already life changing!!! =]

our really accurate replications of the tabernacle